Letting go..

Have you ever grown attached to certain things or even people and perhaps found it hard to ever imagine your life without them in it? Well, though it is not necessary that this weird separation anxiety will  cause harm to you, there are instances when a person becomes so blinded by his or her insecurities that he or she forgets the big picture and falls into a state of narrow mindedness for a passing red herring. I admit that like a countless others, I have fallen into that chasm of anxiety myself. Needless to say,   it isn’t  always a red herring that passes by, but rather certain people and experiences  who touch the core of our consciousness in a way we had never known before. It might be the death of a  beloved family member, a companion , a pet, that triggers the fabrication of such a frightening chasm of the mind, etc.

However, death isn’t to be blamed all the time. It can be a simple factor such as distance that separates you from being in company with the person or thing  you desire.  It might be a friend of yours whom you grew up with, who suddenly had to relocate to a far off place and over a period of time, and lost touch with you, only to remain as a happy memory. I personally went through a dramatic transformation in the way I perceived mortality and the purpose of life itself, when my grandmother passed away. I vowed to myself that I shall never attend another funeral after hers. This of course resulted in a lot of angry fingers being pointed at me, but I was too bent upon in grieving for my granny to let such things get to my head.

There are times when you realize that sooner or later , something that you take for granted in everyday life, doesn’t last as long as you think it would have. For instance, I have spent two years of my life here at Aloysius, growing as an individual and developing my identity and as time flew past, I was  met with numerous experiences which have now taken a special place in my heart and mind. Given the fact that I can’t stay here as a student of SAPUC forever, it still bothers me that I can do nothing to manipulate time for my own convenience. In my case and a countless others as well, we form intimate connections with our immediate environment, our personal workspace, our colleagues , and other people we meet. When we are young, we seem to be so impatient to pass on to the next level and can’t wait to become adults..but after having tasted this newfound freedom and having felt empowered , conferred by this  state of extra ordinary awareness, we wish we’d stayed as kids who saw the world through curious little eyes rather than becoming bored ever so often due to the lack of new stimuli.

We seldom approve of unexpected “goodbyes and farewells”. We go to unusual heights to deny the obvious, all for nought and in vain. We must understand that it is inevitable to suffer a loss or two on this perilous voyage of life. No amount of tears or countless prayers can stop what was destined to happen sooner or later. The trick is to accept reality and move on, growing stronger , wiser and more equipped to deal with similar situations in the future. Tears well up in my eyes every time I take a stroll through the college campus on a holiday, when flashes of memory hit me in the face when I look at specific structures or trees or classrooms that I am far too familiar with. The library especially has a tale of it’s own; numerous books, some that are timeless, the ever smiling librarians,the fellow book-worms you only exchanged glances with, it was all too lovely. The canteen is a hub of a million more stories. Us friends have had many a good laugh surrounded by the aroma of food, and have exchanged jokes, worries, tears, smiles and everything in between.

I don’t mean to say that we never encountered unpleasant moments during our time here as students…it’s just that, even if we did, their  impact as such , is far trifling than that of others. Moments of pure bliss never fail to overshadow dull ones. It is indeed hard to accept that soon..all of this will just be a clump of memories in the back of my head..as years will go by, times will change, people will change, governments will come and go, replacing a seat of power with one maniac after another, but one thing will never change..like a thousand other students, it will be up to people like you and me  to treasure these memories and not let the fast pace at which the world is moving overwhelm us..

So…. what does it mean to truly let go?   Let me put it my way :It is to honor the memories of people or experiences by acknowledging their impact on our growth as  human beings while at the same time respecting the decision of  the Almighty and his plan in the grand scheme of things, regardless of whether your interests line up with his or not.

So I personally ask you to do this: Enjoy all the precious little moments of happiness that comes your way. Treasure them in your heart and smile whenever you get the opportunity to recall them. And for the unpleasant memories …try to extract a lesson out of them, for they are those that will better equip you, with tools, skills and much-needed experience to deal with similar situations in the future.

 

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